While this post may sound more negative than usual; I assure you that it’s not. In fact, while my mood may not presently be glowing, it is reflective and mindful. So much so that I can no longer sleep; and I love my sleep.
Due to my career, I often think about how many hats I need to wear in a day. How many roles I need to switch between in order to perform my role successfully. On a grander scale, we all do this same feat we on a daily, hourly, and even moment to moment basis.
I am a man, romantic, talker, dreamer, a positive force in the universe. I am a leader, professional, mentor, peer, student, subordinate. I am a psychiatrist, appraiser, technician, expert of my field. I am an author, writer, publisher, editor, graphic designer, blogger. I am a chef, maid, provider, financial consultant, loan officer, landscaper, laborer, contractor, plumber, electrician, carpenter. I am a son, grandson, brother, cousin, nephew, friend, best friend, lover, partner, and someday; husband, father.
This is the tip of the iceberg that is “M.C. Grimm”, and we all have a list of “I am”s to be proud of. I think for a moment you should stop here, close your eyes, and think about who you are before reading on.
Did you do it? Feel good! Know that you are a powerful force in the universe and decide what you want to use your power for; good or evil, positive or negative? You can’t be neither and both is, well – complicated.
The purpose of my thought is to provoke something in you. Often do I hear about situations that change. Relationships, friendships, desires and needs, shift and while that isn’t always a negative thing, I believe the only way to understand ourselves and whatever applicable situation is to reflect. Here is my thoughts on this with some examples:
If I decide to stop being a plumber/carpenter/electrician, I start to let my home fall into disrepair. If I decide not to be a provider, I become taxing on my family.
Okay here’s another something from my list; I am a maid. No, I’m not Cinderella – this is actually one that many will have on their list. No, I mean that I am a relatively clean person and clean the house regularly and without discretion (aka I do not operate by ‘that is not my mess so I won’t clean it’). I like to clean the house before I go on weekend trips so I come back to a clean home (something my mother taught me), I try to clean the kitchen as I cook (something my father taught me), I do laundry before the hamper is full (something I learned from never having clean clothes as a teenager), etc. When I say maid I simply mean; I tidy my surroundings regularly.
Now, I need you to imagine that I decide not to be a maid anymore. I say decide because we are always deciding who we are and what we will be, we are not victims of circumstance, certainly not when it comes to our character. It is not as simple as crossing maid off the list, no, we replace it. Because I do not only cease to be clean; I begin to be messy.
If a friend decides to be distant, you become an acquaintance and eventually; a stranger.
If one becomes a parent and ceases to be a spouse; you are no longer a family. Not, at least, in the fulfilling and desirable meaning of the word.
This is why we are choosing good or evil. The absence of evil does not make you good. If I am a messy person, I may not think I’m hurting anyone, but what about those who also call this place home? If I choose not be a decent son/brother/etc, I become an estranged relative, and imagine how your loved ones might feel.
The world, life; is bigger than you. Your decisions affect everything around you. Be mindful, practice your reflection, appreciate what/who you have, love who and what you are and if you don’t currently love yourself; don’t just change – evolve. This is a daily exercise, let it become as natural as the beating of your very heart.
In summary, you can decide if this is a positive or negative post. Is this a mindfulness exercise where you discover an appreciation and love for yourself and those around you that inspire you to be an even better person, friend, and lover? Or can you find enough things in here that make you question yourself to make this post negative, and then decide to make a difference? Or I guess find it negative, but do nothing about it…
The choice is, as always – yours.
**Image credited to artist contributions at pixabay.com**