There is a reality that exists where you are exactly where you wanted to be. That could mean physically in city you want, emotionally with the love your heart desires, or even just professionally in the industry you always dreamt you’d work in. Take any one of those avenues and more and ask ‘where do i want to be? am i happy where i am?’.
Now let’s start off with what we have because being able to sleep in a bed and eat a warm meal is a luxury in itself. Really take a moment to think about this one – its easy to not appreciate the beauty we have in the day to day. I have an old rusty truck, but it runs and gets me to work. My boss is a nightmare, but I have the money to feed my family. Undoubtedly, things could always take a turn for the worse so do take a minute to reflect on what treasures you already have.
I’ve said this in other posts and I believe it fully – we are not meant only to survive, we are meant to live. This means defining what happiness is to you and then getting ourselves there. Sometimes it can be as simple as packing up and moving to a new state.
I personally always wanted to leave the suburbs and move further from the city. I wanted to know what it was like to be in the woodlands of the country and hear what silence actually sounds like. To smell the scent of open air and not just on my one week vacation each year. No, I wanted to open my door in the morning and be greeted by the clean chill of mountain air and the sound of wind churning the tress – not traffic and car horns. It took me many years to gather the courage to pack up and actually make the move, something I wish I had done much sooner. For me it was such a heavy weight to carry and the very thought of leaving behind everything I had ever known was frightening. My regular pizza place knew me by name and on every street on the island – I could tell you a story about some time I did something ridiculous at some off hour of the night. So yes, it was familiar and comfortable, but it wasn’t what I wanted. For me the next chapter of ‘my journey to a happy life’ was packing up a uhaul with my wife and making the move.
For me, with this particular chapter – it was more simple than others. I had to talk myself up to it, believe that it was best for me and my family, and commit to making it happen. Call it a leap of faith if you will. Like jumping off that cliff in Aruba (photo above) and knowing you want crash into the rocks below. I had to commit to a start date at work, a move date for our lease, and so on. Without a doubt stressful, but isn’t everything that changes your life? For things that are better or worse, the hardest part is getting started and making the change.
And that’s the part that works across the board, for me and for you. For chapter 1 and chapter 27, wherever you are. The hardest part is getting started. There is no change that truly comes easily, not by the way in which the world generally operates. Something as simple as moving has so many strings attached, leases, expenses, activating utilities, etc. It is intimidating enough to talk yourself out of it and go back to the normal routine. But it’s worth it, I promise you.
Now, let’s say you have been in a grind for a while and put off your big move. To another place, another career, a new relationship or going back to school – whatever. You had a dream in mind some time ago, but the regular day to day has long since pushed that thought out of your mind. Or maybe the goal has become more about the costs of surviving that living has taken a back seat.
Stop. You already know the answer. You know the dream that plays in your mind, you just need to remember it. It isn’t lost, only forgotten. Like when you wake up with a smile and can’t remember what you were dreaming about. If you lay back down and close your eyes for a minute, it can come back to you. I need you to do that. Stop thinking about all the ways you can’t do something, and how you have so many others responsibilities to manage and just – stop. Don’t ask yourself ‘how can i afford to start that business’ or ‘what would i do with my kids if i went back to work’ and just put yourself there. Put yourself in a state of ‘anything can happen’ and see where this daydream takes you.
As you start to put yourself into this dream take notice of how the details are developing. Maybe your dream was to start a bakery, what on the shelves? If the lines out the door because you are stellar at cakes, maybe this can be started out of your house. Maybe it was to be an author, what genre are you publishing? Remember you can’t be an author if you haven’t written a book, have you committed to putting some words to the page or has the publishing process steered you away? Don’t let the unknown frighten you, every great player was at one point a rookie.
This dream is the spark that ignites the fire so let it burn and fan it with inspiration. Dive into it and let the details bring it to life in your mind.You are not too old, too invested or lacking of money/time to bring it to life. You might find yourself surprised of how much this dream comes back to you if you only close your eyes – and stop saying ‘no’.